Looking back at poems I've written during the 80s... those bittersweet romantic times of love found and lost. Some maudlin sentiments.
Like the birds in the clear blue sky
I falter, yet never stop to fly.
Met a man, held eyes with him
I blushed and remembered feelings long forgotten
Something like ... deja vu.
Oftentimes...
I would catch myself staring blankly
And I would remember far beyond in time
Of wondrous moments, of that beautiful feeling
And oftentimes...
I would reprimand myself for being such a sentimental fool.
I wish you never loved me
I wish you never even cared
And at times, I wish we'd never even met
For dear friend, it hurts to say "No"
And to know that things just couldn't be so.
I barricaded myself with insurmountable walls and built gates so high
Not wanting someone to break through my defenses...
So afraid to be exposed and let the world see...
the nakedness of my spirit, the vulnerability of my soul, the weakness of my emotions
I don't want to be hurt again.
I found you
You found me
Why is it we found we're not for each other after all?
If I meet someone... how could I tell him that I have no more love to share?
How could I admit that all these emotions have been drained from me?
Sometimes
I dream of chasing rainbows
But they would disappear once I'm on the verge of touching them
And I would then dream of you chasing me offering a plate of little rainbows
I would then turn my back and continue chasing my own rainbows
And when I wake up
I think of you and me.
